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A Post-Partum Pony & Pocketed Toddler T-Shirts – The Ashley’s Reality Roundup

A Post-Partum Pony & Pocketed Toddler T-Shirts – The Ashley's Reality Roundup
“It could possibly be worse…you might be Starburst!”

It’s time once once more to dive into the pool of trainwrecky and examine in with our galpals from Teen Mother OG! As per traditional, they’re complaining about every little thing and doing nothing. Before we will leap into this episode, let’s recap what occurred on the last episode: yet one more (female) child was sprung from Catelynn‘s loins; Amber bossed her boyfriend around and shamed him for performing bodily features on her time; Butch was apparently too busy prowlin’ the drug-filled streets to point out up for his family, and Maci bitched about Ryan.

So, principally… it’s business as traditional in Teen Mom Land.

(For this episode, The Ashley was solely capable of recap Catelynn’s and Maci’s elements. She principally made like Farrah‘s pants and went “half ass.”)

We start things off with Catelynn and Tyler. Now that they’ve efficiently shucked the afterbirth off their new child, they’re taking photographs of their new daughter, Vaeda. (The Ashley nonetheless feels like the identify “Not Tezlee” higher suited the kid, however it’s what it’s…)

April is there, and doubtless marveling over the truth that her youngsters are rich enough to pay a real photographer to return to their home and take portraits of their child. (I’d assume that when Catelynn was born, the one footage April had taken have been when Uncle Eddie brought over his Kodak Funsaver disposable digital camera and needed to make use of up his roll of movie from the native tractor show.)

“Child pictures taken right in your home! I really feel like considered one of them rich bitches who go to the Portrait Studio at the JC Penny!”

Cate tells us that Nova is ignoring her child sister. When Cate asks Nova if she needs to get in an image with Vaeda, Nova runs away screaming “No! No! No! No!” (very similar to her dad Tyler in all probability did every time he came upon Catelynn was having one other child woman).

Catelynn tells us that, in between organizing search events to seek out Butch, coping with a new child and making an attempt to ensure Nova doesn’t listing her baby sister for sale on Craigslist, she is making an attempt to take it straightforward so that the postpartum melancholy she had after giving start to Nova doesn’t come again. 

Producer Kerthy comes over to share some knowledge with Cate and Ty.

“One of many things that may happen is the new mother and father can get distracted by the brand new baby,” she tells them. 

Cate insists that isn’t occurring here. The truth is, she tells us that she’s even prepared to play “therapy horses” with Nova…however she sets an alarm so she doesn’t need to play a second greater than she promised the kid.

I feel that’s good…

“I’m tremendous busy, you realize? I mean…my Instagram isn’t gonna examine itself!”

Meanwhile, in Tennessee, it’s T-minus one week until Ryan, King of the Meals City Floozies, is being launched from the clink. Maci is nervous for when Ryan is as soon as again a free man; nevertheless she doesn’t have any time to do much thinkin’ on Ryan as a result of her clothes line has an enormous promotion arising! 

(Have Maci and Taylor determined to finally launch that leather-pocketed beer pouch? Or perhaps that line of “Beer on Board” automotive stickers?) 

No…it’s truly a toddler clothes line that the oopsie infants, Jayde and Maverick, can be modeling! Bentley gained’t be capable of attend the shoot, as he is stuck at college.

“Dern all those learnings! I would like all my babies to make a picture together!”

They have about 50 numerous leather-pocketed toddler tops to showcase, so the Oopsie Infants higher get loads of rest. In any other case, Maci should make them “Smize” towards their wills! 

Across town, Mackenzie is chatting with Larry and Jen about Ryan’s upcoming launch from jail. Mackenzie tells them that Ryan calls her on a regular basis, and Jen seems jealous, mentioning that Ryan has only strung up the jail’s tin can telephone and referred to as them 3 times since he’s been behind bars. 

Abruptly— whatdya know?— the jailbird in questions calls in. Mackenzie solutions the telephone, and Ryan begins the convo off by complaining that he’s “drained as f**okay.” (Apparently there’s lots to do in ‘gel?’) 

Ryan makes his first “look” of the season…by way of jailhouse telephone. It’s one of the best he’s appeared in years…

Mackenzie tells Ryan she misses him, and Ryan tells her he misses her too– in between letting out ridiculously long yawns. It’s an extremely awkward conversation and Ryan tells Mack he’ll name her tomorrow. She seems thrilled.

Significantly…was that decision even value Ryan stringing up the tin cans within the jail cell to make?

Mack says she will’t wait till Ryan is there together with her to whisper these candy nothings to her in individual.

In Michigan, Cate is nervous that she’ll soon grow to be exhausted and be back at rehab quicker than you’ll be able to say “Babies is tough.” In reality, she’s decided to deal with herself to a day at the spa. (Maybe she’s getting the ol’ hoo-ha waxed and freshened up so she and Tyler can begin making an attempt for that child boy she promised him?) 

Sadly, although, Nova’s not thrilled with Catelynn’s plan. Nova throws a fit when she hears that Catelynn won’t be enjoying dinosaurs together with her all day and as an alternative will probably be getting plucked and painted. She screeches and hides behind a curtain. Cate and Ty are laughing till Nova begins to mess up the curtain, and Tyler is not having it! 

No one messes with Daddy’s window coverings, woman! 

“My curtains may be ruined, however at the very least I found a beanie that may accommodate my Man Bangs, so there’s that!”

Nova needs to go to the spa with Catelynn but she’s stuck watching Tyler are likely to the infant at house. (Perhaps if the kid will get lucky she’ll get to observe Tyler clip his toenails on the coffee desk?) 

Nova’s simply screaming “I WANT TO!” again and again, as April nyucks it up in the nook. 

“She wouldn’t wanna go if she knew all they do there’s wax cooters!”

Cate kisses a crying Nova and heads out for her spa day. 

Soon, Catelynn’s face-deep in a mud masks, having somebody therapeutic massage her head. She’s glad she took a psychological well being day away from her two screaming youngsters. Catelynn does determine that, despite Nova’s large tantrum, she ought to get a shock.

Cate tells an exhausted-looking Tyler that someone of their ‘hood is hawking mini ponies for less than $500! Tyler appears to do not know why his wife is telling him this, but the horror spreads across his face when he realizes that Cate needs to purchase yet one more animal.

This is totally different than the disastrous mini pig…and the varied therapy horses, and so forth., she insists. This can be a gift for Nova to let her know that she is liked, regardless of the new spawn that’s invaded their farmhome.

When your shirt spells out your emotions about your spouse asking you to purchase her another animal she gained’t deal with…

Tyler’s frightened that Cate’s sudden hankering for animal buyin’ might be a sign of her postpartum coming again. Catelynn insists she’s high quality and just needs to add to her menagerie of animals.

Tyler says he was superb with Cate taking psychological well being spa days and whatnot, however he’s not thrilled about adding another dwelling factor to his record of things he should feed each day.

“God Lord, she’s like Noah! She needs to have two of each animal!”

Tyler lastly tells Catelynn she will buy no matter assorted livestock her coronary heart wishes, which makes her completely happy. Cate says she’ll give it a number of thought before buying the pony.

Spoiler alert: they get the pony.

Catelynn tells us that she doesn’t assume including another horse to their growing animal inhabitants can be more stress. (Um?) 

“It’s the suitable factor for Nova,” Cate provides.

Later, she tells her household that she considered this pony-buying caper for a loooong time before truly she purchased the horse— virtually five WHOLE days! 

When your wife can’t stop shopping for random livestock or having woman infants…

Tyler says he lastly agreed to get the horse when he realized that driving was something Nova and Cate might do together.

In Tennessee, it’s the day of the photoshoot, and Maci and Taylor are stressing out that they gained’t get their leather-pocketed Toddler Tee line photographed in time. (The place’s Uncle Eddie’s Funsaver digital camera whenever you want it?!) 

“That is crap. Nova received a pony and didn’t need to mannequin bizarre T-shirts.”

After a while, they’ve completed capturing the youngsters’s line, but then Maci and Taylor have to go out to a creepy cabin in the woods to shoot the grownup line. She and Taylor are each modeling some hoodies. Quickly, the shoot ends and everybody celebrates bringing bizarre T-shirts to the kindergarten demographic with some Bud Lights. 

We then get to observe Mackenzie get a pedicure (ooooh, aaaah!) As the woman sands down her clodhoppers, Mackenzie tells her pal that she’s apprehensive about Ryan being totally different when he gets released from the clink.

Will he begin making an attempt to burrow out of rooms by way of a chisel and cover up his wall hole with a Raquel Welsh poster? Will he begin wading of their sewer system to apply for the time when he might have to make an escape? Will he start sporting only orange jumpsuits solely? (Hopefully Maci’s T-shirt company releases a line of jailbird wear to assist him out!) 

Mack can also be apprehensive Ryan gained’t want her anymore after his release. 

“That’s why I’m gettin’ my ft all purdied up for him!”

Mackenzie says that Ryan’s keep in jail has been an eye-opener for him.

“Ryan’s starting to understand that he’s around some fairly arduous criminals,” Mack says. 

Ummm…it’s “gel” not the Holiday Inn! What did he anticipate?!

“He’s starting to understand he doesn’t ever need to be there that lengthy once more,” she provides.

Or… you understand… ever once more?

In the meantime, in Tennessee, Maci and Taylor (sporting matching TTM shirts, naturally) sit down to talk about how one can speak to Bentley about his dad’s launch from jail. (I mean, actually, doesn’t everybody need to have this convo with their youngsters sooner or later or one other?) They agree that Bentley is used to his dad being a common disappointment to his family members, and he’s taking it in stride. 

“We actually should speak about our TTM Inmate’s Line if we need to have it ready for the subsequent time Ryan goes to jail…”

To learn The Ashley‘s recap of the earlier episode of ‘Teen Mom OG,’ click here! 

(Photographs: MTV) 

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